Sir Ken speaks to Sonia Benavides, mother of 4 from Mexico

We first spoke to Sonia in April, right at the beginning of Mexico’s experience of the pandemic, and she shared with us how her family had initially struggled with learning from home, but changing her daily schedule to be more flexible, involving her children in household chores and making homework tasks more creative had all helped. We were very grateful to be able to recently catch up with Sonia again, to see how her and her family were doing a few months down the line.

She wrote…

I was remembering the other day, day 100 of confinement to be precise, my chat with Sir Ken, and realising how much had been accomplished, and also how different things are now. I would like to share some of my thoughts and hopefully others can connect with it too.

Two months have passed since our conversation, and it seems like ages ago! This new normal was not a walk in the park, quite a ride through an unpaved road. Like other parents around the globe, when this ordeal began, I had my own share of high expectations which for my own sake had to be taken out of the picture, the sooner the better. A lot of work had to be done, a lot of planning and doing; but everything was at ease, the moment I got rid of all those ridiculously high standards nesting in my head.

School ended earlier in our district, school authorities and teachers had to regroup and start planning a better strategy for the new school year that will surely kick off online. This year the kids will have a bigger vacation period, it will be a long summer. Now that all the homework assignments are off the table, it has given me time to evaluate the good, the bad and the ugly of this learning from home experience. This assessment was not only unavoidable, it was helpful to point out what went great and what went wrong, to make the right adjustments on the daily routine for my kids’ new normal life. School may be over, but not the work at home: keeping the children busy, entertained, exercised, healthy and stress free. That is still quite a task for any parent. And while we’re at it, do not forget to meet the financial challenges too. Mexican government believes that the Covid-19 pandemic has reached its peak, in terms of new daily cases, although it will persist in certain areas until October. So, it will be a long year…

Of course, worrying too much won’t help at all, so the best I can do is focus on the things I can rely on, the things I can change, and keep up the routine so the kids can have a safe and structured environment. On the bright side, they have really changed their attitude towards the household chores, and their help around the house is remarkable. They are really understanding and appreciating the significance of being part of a community, a self sustained community. This is one of the many gifts Covid-19 has brought to my home. Thanks to this commitment, now we have more time on our hands, I have enrolled the children in online classes (such as dance lessons, painting, video game coding, and a third language). I also have time for myself now, yoga and meditation as well. Even time for gardening, and it’s so therapeutic!

This pandemic has taken a lot from humanity, it also has changed the way we think and feel about life, but in the middle of all the sorrow, ironically, life has sprung, new ideas have emerged and I have learned a great deal.  Another gift I have accepted, is this new self awareness of my own limitations, and how great it is to say “NO,” how great it is to say “I NEED HELP,” and how great it is to say “IT DOESN’T NEED TO BE PERFECT.” Giving myself permission to fail, and start again without the drama, has been a relief. When I freed myself, I was also able to let my children free. It helped me understand and encourage my children’s uniqueness, by respecting their own pace in learning; discovering my children’s talents, loving their sense of humour, imagination and curiosity; noting their likes and dislikes; perceiving their fears, aspirations, anxieties and desires. Getting to know them at a new Covid-19 level. This has been my ride so far; I just hope whatever bumps are in the road we can all get through.